Thursday, February 13, 2014

Coffee Chat 7.0 with Author S.K. Anthony: I Love You!

[S.K. bangs on E.R.'s door.]

SKA: [Singing.] Wise men saaaaaayyyyyyyyy only fools rush innnnnnnnn—hichic—but I can't help falling in love with—oh, heeeyyyy!

[Takes a sip from a bottle as E.R. opens the door.]

ER: Um, S.K.? Are you all right out there? Wow, have you been here long? I heard an awful noise.

SKA: [Continues to sing.] Shall I staayyyyyyy, would it be a sinnnnnnnnn?

ER: That was the noise.

SKA: [Singing continues, uninterrupted.] If I can't help falling in loooovvvvve with youuuuuu . . . [Stares at coffeepot with glassy eyes.]

ER: What in the world . . .?

SKA: I luurrve coffee . . . I—hic—thinks me needs some naaoowwww. But—hic—I probably need a nap first . . . [Falls facedown.]

[E.R. closes the door, gets a cup of coffee, and leaves S.K. on the floor.]


ER: Hey, S.K., you need to get up. You're late for Coffee Chat, man. I already drank the first pot by myself and ended up cleaning the whole first floor of my house just to work off the caffeine jitters. I can't believe you didn't wake up when I accidentally mopped you. Uh, sorry for that, by the way.

SKA: Itskayyy . . . I needed a shower anyway. Man, my head hurts. Did you at least make me more coffee?

ER: Duh. Have some. [Pours into the special 24-ounce mug reserved for emergencies.] 

SKA: . . . drinking the whole pot . . . wossamotta with you?

ER: It was looking at me. I couldn't just ignore it, so I had a cup. Then I had a second cup, and you still didn't wake up, and before I knew it, the last cup was empty and I had a mop in my hand and . . . I'd rather not talk about it.

So . . . dare I ask what has you so out of sorts?

SKA: Oh, my boyfriend left me for another girl.

ER: [Coughs.] Um, you're married.

SKA: My book boyfriend, I mean. Kevin, the main character from Static—he just broke my heart . . . and Valentine's Day is tomorrow. Sigh . . .

[E.R. is trying hard at this point to not roll eyes. Looks at S.K. and then quickly looks away.]

SKA: Don't look at me like that! I realize I'm the one who wrote it, and that he isn't real. It still hurts, though. He's such a cutie. I figured I'll drink it off today so I can spend tomorrow in a happy mood. I don't think my honey—

ER: [Interrupts.] Your real live husband-person honey—

SKA: Yeah—would appreciate me being sad over a fictional character—that I made up in my head—on Valentine's Day. What are your plans for tomorrow?

ER: Well, first, I'll wake up super-early so I can bake heart-shaped scones for my sweetheart. While they bake, I'll brew the coffee so that when it's all done, I can carry a tray of yummy stuff up to him while serenading him with a love song I wrote myself. It's called "I Love You More Than Chocolate Even When You and Chocolate Are Standing Beside Each Other in the Same Room." Oh, and I'll be sizzling up a special dozen of bacon roses so he knows how much I love him. 

SKA: You wrote a song for him? Gosh, I . . . I . . . hmmmm.

ER: Okay, so maybe that's not exactly the reality. The reality is more like the alarm will go off and I'll hit the snooze a couple times. By the time I get up, my sweetie will have gotten up, headed downstairs, gone outside to feed the animals, and come back upstairs to bring coffee to me. I still might sing the chocolate song, though, 'cause I have a good feeling about that one.

SKA: Oh, good! I don't feel too bad now. I'm making some chocolate-covered strawberries for dessert. And by "making," I mean I'll call hubby to pick some up for me us. We'll have dinner with the kids as usual, pig out on our fruits, and then complain about how tired we both are. Luckily, neither one of us is into celebrating or going all out for these holiday things. We just like to chill; no material gifts needed in this household. Nope. Sleep is what's most appreciated. Just sleep. Can you tell we're the parents of teeny little ones?

ER: I have to admit, we don't do the "Hallmark Holidays" either. I'm happy with a husband who treats me great 365 days a year (366 on leap years), so a card isn't going to make or break the marriage. Chocolate doesn't hurt, but he knows me well enough to keep a secret stash for emergencies. I got a Valentine card from him once, and I told him he never had to get me another, because it was so spectacular, he'd never top it. He still gets me cards on occasion, but we never feel forced because the calendar tells us we have to.

SKA: Oooh, emergency chocolate stash . . . yes, that's all that stayed with me. Your guy is sweet, my guy is sweet . . . but chocolate! We're almost the same here, too. But on leap years, that's the one day I give the guy a break and I'm the super sweet one. We take turns; it's only fair.

ER: We met on April Fool's Day, if you can believe that, so by our very first Valentine's Day, we'd been dating almost ten months. Because I hadn't really said anything, I guess he panicked and thought he'd better hurry on out to the store and get a card . . . maybe he thought my silence was a test or something. The only place still open was the apothecary down the street, and apparently, there was only one card left. When the time was right, he looked deep into my eyes, handed me the card, and I opened . . . this. 

It was the best Valentine's Day card a gal could possibly ask for.

Sigh . . . that's all the time we have for coffee today. S.K. is headed home to her real, live husband and will hopefully have a great day. Don't forget, our Share the Love giveaway ends tonight at midnight EST, so make sure you get your entries in! We can't wait to give prizes to YOU!

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You can find everyone in the following places:
S.K. Anthony:
Easy Reader Editing: you are here. :)
Raymond Esposito:
Stephen Fender:
Debra Ann Miller:
Sisters Baking Company:
Sarah YourBetaReader:


  1. Chocolate? What no Ben & Jerry's? Love the clown card too. Boy, he knew you well only 10 months into your relationship!

    SKA~ Sorry to hear about your break-up with Kevin and so close to Valentine's Day too! He'll be a hard one to get over for sure. No worries, there are always more fish in the sea or in your case more scenes to write :)

    Ahh, Valentine's Day. A Hallmark tradition that invokes panic in all of us. If you don’t buy something red and heart-shaped for someone, you’re going to hurt someone’s feelings and contribute to the fall of the economy, or so some might say. Whatever happened to the good old days of cutting out simple paper hearts, scarfing down a couple of powdery candies stamped with "Be Mine" on the side, and calling it a day?

    1. I get my fair share of homemade cards (my husband loves to draw cartoon things for me) and they're always my favorite. When the kids were tiny, he'd have them "sign" the cards with whatever baby food was on their hands at the time.

      Oh, the pressure on today's young men. Poor guys.

    2. Ben & Jerry's? Umm, yes please!!! It will help with Kevin's selfishness...

  2. Chocolate can cure a lot of ills. When we have it, I tell myself about all the antioxidants it has! Nobody thinks about the bad stuff, right?

    1. Bad stuff? What bad stuff? It's all antioxidants, all the way. Dark chocolate and a fist full of blueberries, and you'll live to be 102. Guaranteed. :)

      Thanks for visiting and commenting!

  3. I'm guessing the reality version will be the one that happens tomorrow.

    1. I'm guessing you're right. Reality is reality, after all. He may even give me extra coffee just to keep me from singing. Happy Valentine's Day, Alex! Thanks for stopping by.

    2. You are very wise, Alex. Very wise.

  4. Ah V day. The celebration of heart shaped chocolate molds. Hey SK want me to send Zander over to beat Kevin up? He will do it.

    1. lol send Zander...with chocolate! Or any kind of 'a la mode' dessert. I'll take it.

    2. You didn't even have to try for a food this week, Brandon. See, we gave you a freebie because it's a holiday.

  5. I like to sing. I want to sing, too. You guys never invite me to anything. No one does. You're all scared I'll sing.


    1. I think I feel a song comin' on...

      We'll invite you AND we'll let you sing! And if no one else invites you,'s their loss. We like you. We really, really like you.

    2. Janie, you're invited! To some future event thingy, and to comment here all you want lol And, hey you can sing all you want. If people survived my singing, you'll be just fine ;)

    3. Gosh, thanks. I feel a love song forming in my diaphragm.

  6. Hey, just say the word and I'll send my "Marketing Associates" to take care of Kevin. They'll bring chocolates too.

    1. James, you're my hero! <3 <3 <3

    2. Hey, I think I deserve chocolate for getting a clown mask...

    3. of course Lynda but you told me not to send them over.

    4. Perhaps I was too hasty. Your Marketing Associates may "enforce" chocolate at my house any day of the week.


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