Hey party people! S.K. here. Come with me as I pull off the best stunt yet. I want to shock Lynda into possibly going speechless for at least ten seconds. How, you ask? Well, I'm showing up at the appointed time AND I'm not sneaking in. Ready? [Knocks on door.]
SK: Hi, Lynda!
ER: Who's out there? I have a cat—I mean, a gun! Yes, I have a gun and I'm not afraid to use it. [Clanking noises and meowing heard on the other side of the door. Puts on glasses to take a good look. Mouth opens and closes, but no sounds issue forth.]
SK: Yes, it's me. [Grins.]
ER: . . . but . . . but . . . are you okay? [Looks at watch, and back into the house to make sure S.K. really isn’t already in the house.]
SK: Of course I’m okay . . . for now . . . put the cat down! I'm not an alien or a clone. I just figured I'd be on my best behavior for once. You weren’t really going to throw AndyAndy at me, were you?
ER: Prove it's really you. What does the real S.K. do in the Loudermilks' band?
SK: I used to play maracas and the triangle, before I was "encouraged" to just dance in the background instead. The other me, Mildred Loudermilk, brings a more harmonious music to the band by not playing instruments or singing any notes. It’s a gift, really.
ER: It really IS you. But you're outside the door. I'm so confused. You'd think I'd be relieved to not find you beside the bed, or in the laundry room. [Sadly notes the pile of still-dirty laundry.] Well, come on in. What's today's topic?
SK: You know, I actually don't know what we should chat about. I figure we should wing it, and we can even show our readers a snippet of how we come up with our genius ideas. Whatcha think?
ER: I think it might frighten them. But speaking of winging it reminds me of our chat two weeks ago when we ran out of time due to . . . um . . . someone else's fault.
SK: Ha! Yes, I don't even remember what stupidity we came up with, but look at the snippet I found:
After we both threw several ideas around, you said:
ER: That's it for the great ideas. Pitiful. Just pitiful.
SK: We can just chat about nothing in particular.
ER: Hahaha. We can.
SK: "When Winging It is All We Got!"
ER: I can attach the Spongebob clip with him and Patrick saying, "I dunno, what do YOU want to do?"
SK: Do eeet! . . . Or, “We Got Wings!”
ER: Wing me up, baby!
I’m not sure anyone else can really follow that.
ER: Actually, that was probably one of our better chats. Especially since that kilt thing never panned out.
SK: We'll work on our kilt problem. For now I'm glad we had the “winging it” idea on the back burner 'cause it came in handy for today. Someone is running around like a wild chicken with three heads, and I'm not naming names, but Lynda, it's you.
So tell me, are you ready to give in to my way of life? Is the life of an insomniac sounding a bit more appealing to you? I don't want you to think I don't care what you have to say, but regardless of your answer, I brought you a couple boxes of coffee and a barrel of RedBull to carry you through. [Whispers.] Come over to the dark side . . . oh, umm sorry. I forgot I was supposed to be on my best behavior.
ER: I've thought about being an insomniac, and although the idea sure sounds appealing, I can't manage to stay awake long enough to enjoy it. Actually, I feel like a big wimp every time I start to get sleepy before 10 p.m., since I've always been a night person. Going to bed before 2 a.m. just seems so wrong. It goes against the musician in me.
SK: Well, I think you should try it. Look at me; I’m normal.
ER: As long as you've brought the RedBull, maybe I'll try it and give you a progress report. And by that, I mean I'll have to tell you if I make ANY progress on ANYTHING, since right now I'm just staying afloat.
Maybe we should talk about something book-related. Have you read any good books lately?
SK: The last book I read was the third in the Bloodline Series by Richelle Mead, The Indigo Spell. I'm enjoying these books a lot. The fourth one is staring at me, while I eagerly wait for the fifth to be released this July. I'm trying to hold off on it to avoid getting too desperate before July. Book series, I love them but the wait kills me! What about you?
ER: I'm not even sure if I've read anything for pleasure in the past two months. I've wanted to, but I'm pretty sure that doesn't count. I've read for edits, and the book I just finished was a pleasure to read, so I'm going to count it. Alice Reeds' Into the Unknown was a good one, and it's the first of three, so I'm looking forward to her second one whenever it happens. I also started Kergulen by R.A. White about a month ago, and because I haven't had much reading time, it's taking me much too long to finish it, although I'm enjoying it quite a bit.
SK: Oh, books, they’re the best at providing us an escape from the crazy things life throws at us—uh, Lynda? Are you falling asleep?
ER: Hey, I was reading that. I mean, drinking that. Weren’t we going to talk about books or something today? I’m not even sure if I’ve read anything for pleasure—
SK: [Interrupts.] If you say so. You know what? Go to your couch and rest your head on AndyAndy’s lap. I’ll take care of the rest.
Okay people, that’s enough. Get out of here and let Lynda sleep a bit. (And don’t you dare tell her I kicked you out so un-nicely. Her being exhausted takes a toll on me.) GO! . . . But, umm, come back next week so we can treat you to another lovely coffee chat. Bu-bye now.
Hugs and kisses,
Yes, this really is Lynda's cat, AndyAndy, and he really does sit like that all the time.
You can find S.K. Anthony in a number of places. She's on Twitter @SKathAnthony, her website is www.skanthony.com, her Facebook page is S Katherine Anthony, and on occasional occasions, she'll be right here with me, drinking coffee and laughing it up over our latest plans and schemes. And possibly even talking about books and writing.
You can find me here. I'm always here.